Benedict Cumberbatch, the Shower of Evil, & the Gravity Well of Fanservice

Benedict Cumberbatch from Star Trek: Into Darkness — You want to stare at me like a piece of meat, do you? So...shall we begin?

Over the course of the action-explodo-thon of Star Trek Into Darkness, there is a shot of Alice Eve in her underwear. I didn’t mind it, partly because it was a brief blip in a film that I was enjoying the momentum of, and partly because I own a penis. But apparently, there has been some kerfuffle about this–and in J.J. Abrams‘ appearance on Conan (shown after the jump), he explains what his thought process was. And, you know, penis or not (though for the record: there is one), I can see where he could have been going for that and it was a beat that just didn’t quite work in that way.

But yeah, he would have saved himself a ton of trouble if he had just left the shower scene in. All will be explained:
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Regardless, I don’t want to wade into the whole “Alice Eve underwear bad, Cumberbatch shower good” conflict that a lot of women are working their way through right now. What I do want to address is something I’ve noticed about people who did not like the film, scantily dressed people or not. It seems that a lot of them–not all, mind you, but a lot of them–are old school Trek fans (not even hardcore, just old school).

So in the interests of equal time for both Star Trek Prime and Star Trek II: Trek Harder, I give you this: