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G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009) – 27 Second Review

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra movie poster

Written by: Stuart Beattie, David Elliot, Paul Lovett, and Michael Gordon
Directed by: Stephen Sommers
Starring: Ray Park, Marlon Wayans, Channing Tatum, Dennis Quaid, Rachel Nichols, Byung-Hun Lee, Saïd Taghmaoui, Joseph-Gordon Levitt, Christopher Eccleston, Sienna Miller, Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje, Arnold Vosloo, Jonathan Pryce

Review: Casting Ray Park as Snake Eyes earned them a lot of leeway. I was even willing to forgive the fact that they put lips on his mask. It’s the ninja equivalent of Bat-Nipples. But they countered that with a good deal of brilliant homage, as well as enough kicksplode to entertain me for the two hours needed. Even if they twisted a fond childhood memory a bit (Accelerator Suits…? The hell?), the action made it a fun movie. Not a great movie by any means, mind you, but a fun one.

Time: 21 seconds

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2 comments

  • Ray Park? You know, that makes a lot of sense. After all, Ray Park is The Hottest Man Who Never Shows His Face On Camera.

    I was completely uninterested in seeing this movie until you said that, you know. Now….

    Also, isn’t Chris Eccleston Destro?

    Heee, Destro.

  • Yes, Ray Park is just ninja enough to cover up all the suck and leave everything smooth and fun.