Gatorade is trying to go EXXXTREME even beyond the EXXXTREME that they already had going. Which means they are now EXXXTRA EXXXTREME. They’re taking their attitude to 11, in other words. Let’s see what they have to say for themselves:
It also means “General Audiences.” Which represents Benji movies. I’m just saying. They’re changing the names of their drinks as well–I think–the previous name is still up there on the container artwork. Anyway…
- Gatorade Fierce® is now Bring It™
- Gatorade X-Factor® changes to Be Tough™
- Gatorade AMâ„¢ is now called Shine Onâ„¢
- Gatorade Rainâ„¢ becomes No Excusesâ„¢
Or a “name of the drink fits the bottle” mentality, apparently. As you can see on the bottle we have up there, these titles are so impressive and EXXXTRA EXXXTREME they come in a font size so big they can’t fit properly on the bottle. I’m sure this just means they’re going to roll out bigger 50 oz. drinks or something.
[ad#longpost]Anyway, the press release/story on BevNET says that they’re rolling out the updated stuff later this year. I hope they hurry. They got two days left.
Now I don’t want to give Gatorade a hard time. Well, okay, kinda. But the concept of Gatorade being “Fierce” is completely alien to me. I think they had found their groove with the black and white commercials in which the athletes had consumed so much Gatorade they were sweating it out of their bodies. In neon colors, no less. And granted, I’m not athletically inclined. More reclined or even declined as the case may be. So maybe among sports-types Gatorade is the shit and whipping out a bottle of it without announcing it is the equivalent of flicking open a switchblade…I have no idea. But around here, Gatorade is what you drink when you’re feeling under the weather and you need to get liquids in you. That’s about as badass as Gatorade gets.
Another example of a blatant marketing “drive by”. This one dupes the execs into thinking that they are not staying “ahead of a trend” by creating an unknown fear. It also tells the consumer (I, myself have always enjoyed plain old Gatorade,in any form) that we are gerbils that need to migrate ourselves into the “next era of beverages”! Good gosh! I need to BE TOUGH, BRING IT! I must SHINE ON with NO EXCUSES! Can I please just have some Gatorade? Oh, maybe I am no longer cool enough…Ok, I’ll just have some coffee…
That’s right, Wes. Never forget: coffee will always be there for you. It’s like Silverstein’s Giving Tree. But much less creepy.
C’mon now, even Sarah Cynthia Sylvia Stout had some coffee grounds in her trash.